loving you was like the seasons

Call my name; make me turn around one more time,
If only so you can see me, the way my eyes are shining from the tears,
The love only reflected when I stare at you.
We had a summer that fell into the seasons when it shouldn’t,
Lasting longer than it should…
But no one would ever complain about more summer nights and blue skies.
Call me name, the way that makes me cry and laugh at the same time.
The way I wished you’d never stop calling out to me…

The leaves change and we try to glue them to the trees,
Their reds and yellows and browns mixing with the death in the air,
And our summer nights have lost its romance and playful stars.
Call my name, once more attempt to stop the inevitable.
But we both know the chill is here to stay, our distance growing,
As the leaves fall down, down, down…

But when the wind picks up, the chill in the air that can’t leave my bones,
It’s a sign that this love has lasted its course,
Broken and bent, it’ll take more that a few nice words and a caress of love to break the unsettlement that winter brings,
Though your kiss brings more frost than the chill of the ice.
Call my name…but what’s the point,
I can’t seem to hear you over this blizzard passing through,
Can’t seem to care that I see you mouth open and close, that silence echoes
As the snow melts into the clouds, dancing down onto our frozen skin…

Loving you was like the seasons,
Bring the best when the world was at its peak,
Breathless and beautiful, full of life with so much potential,
But beautiful things are never meant to last for long,
And as the snow begins to fall, I remember the summer nights with you,
And the winter breeze rushes through me,
Reminding me that beauty blooms and fades,
But spring will come once again, and maybe then we can pick up the broken parts,
As the cycle continues, fading in and out, but never once breaking course

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storm clouds & rainbows

Wash the rain away and call my name like you need me.
I’ll be waiting for you in the shadows the clouds cast,
Left to be sought in the middle of a storm that comes and goes as she pleases.
We’ve been stuck for so long I can’t imagine who I was before you.
I wish I was sorry, but I can’t seem stay away,
Can’t fight the reasons I should, though I desperately want to…but do I?
And most days I push those doubts and fears so far back in my mind I wish they’d
disappear,
The ones that create doubt in this love and cause me to question the ways you love me.

I could spend forever laying with you, without a care in the world.
These moments, letting myself let go if only for this short eternity with you,
It chases me down, captures me in my moments of weakness and loves me still.
And anyone would be terrified, right?
So forgive me when I push you away and call you names,
It’s the only way I know to lash out, when my feelings are too strong,
When the emotions are too much for me to acknowledge and the love scares me away from feeling everything about you and me.

Wash the rain away; embrace the rainbow that appears after this storm made up of you and me,
And let our colors shine brighter than the sun, the stars in the sky,
Laughing as we wish upon those fallen stars and ask the moon for guidance in the night,
We know that these blue skies are subject to change,
Grey clouds roll through occasionally,
But that doesn’t take away from the moments we create under those blue skies and sunny days,
Because my shadows crave your light, attaching themselves to the best parts of you and me,
And this short eternity we created in the puddles left behind by the storm.
Dancing and laughing, stomping and jumping our way to the heart of us.

Chasing Stars

Let’s chase the stars together, catching the wind and her stories,
Each whispered so gently; I missed the most important parts when you wandered off, running to catch you, but you were already far too gone…
Mine to have, mine to hold, but you were like the tide,
Falling in and out with the moon, coming and going with the night sky,
You were mine once, but this love was gentle, so gentle, too gentle,
That one strong gust of wind came, and you were gone.
She carried you off, let you dance onto the next cloud,
And I was left alone in that meadow,
Wishing on a star that had already granted another’s wish….

The Memory of a Dream

It’s funny how we never expect the sorrows of love to hit us,
Trapped in our ideal fantasy, we can never picture ourselves going through what we witness in others.
I had always thought myself better than that,
Why go through the hurt and pain to experience when there was no need.
But of course, life always has a way of putting us in our place,
And that’s when fate decided it was time for us to meet.

I never cared about the empty side of my bed until you were no longer there to fill it,
I used to mock the songs and stories of those afraid to sleep alone,
But I find myself reaching for a phantom in the middle of the night,
And suddenly I’m just like all those I mocked before,
I am just another soul damaged by the connection found and then lost,
A love experienced in the best and worst ways.
Doomed for us to be repeated every time we find each other,
But at least I get to have you, over and over again…
So I’ll go to bed tonight, wishing you were lying next to me once again,
And maybe fate will decide we’ve suffered long enough,
Maybe she’ll let me find you buried in my dreams, trapped in the existence of a memory
Waiting for me to relive you and set you free.

Last Call (And I Can’t Find You)

I know I always get into trouble when I have that poison running through my veins,
Yet it calls my name, as deadly as she is lovely,
I can’t help but to fall for her again, again, again and again…
Maybe it’s the ruby red, the amber silhouette, the crystal, as it’s slammed into the back of my throat.
The poison lingers at the bottom of my cup like a blaring warning, or maybe a reminder,
But I crave its affects in ways I know I shouldn’t.
Perhaps that was before you, or maybe because of you, I can’t tell,
But you both make me speak words that normally suffocate me,
Each thought and sentiment pouring out, as easily as the liquid in my glass.
I like my vision hazy, my thoughts trailing and endless in that same stupor,
And I still have that, but you somehow make it sharper, clearer and put me back into focus,
Even when I wish I weren’t.

And yes, I’ll admit I clung to this crutch desperately,
How can you rip apart a piece of yourself?
A part so deeply ingrained you can’t picture yourself without it?
But that’s another obstacle for another day, one step at a time, one less glass to fill,
Cheers all around, one last shot to celebrate life, the existence of it, and its absence,
And I’ll continue to pray that I’ll fall out of love with that poison and her tempting ways,
But for now, last call is calling my name and I can’t seem to find you in the crowd,
So I’ll turn to her one last time…promise?

our yesterdays

Every time our yesterdays cross paths, tomorrow seems so much better.
The smile that graces my face always manages to catch me off guard,
As though I’m still surprised by my body’s reaction to you.
Though I should know better by now because no other has made me feel like you do.
Always need to have your way when it comes to me
Why can’t I seem to say no to you?

Heaven help me, but this love seems too much to handle,
Because ever kiss pulls me deeper, every touch intoxicates me,
Making my mind hazy and ready,
I’ve lost myself in you, and I’m not sure I want to be found,
Fallin’ in and out our your yesterdays…our forever and always tomorrows,
Some nights, I can’t believe I call you mine,
And this 3AM love keeps me up well into the night,

Unexpected and still so unsure in so many ways,
But it all seem to melt when I fall into you.
So keep me up, drive me crazy, and outta my mind,
Because I can’t imagine doing this any other way anymore,
So caught up in the present,
I hope tomorrow never comes unless I’m certain its with you.