coastlines

Late nights laughing at drunk texts we sent,
Stars hanging over our hearts,
We drove until the skin bled pink, and lavender,
And the blue in your eyes had never been more beautiful.
I feel in love when the sun rose over our heads,
And we made love in the sunlight.

I miss the way we worked so well,
Falling into sheets, tangled in laughter and cotton,
Late night conversations about the world we would create,
Where we could hide for a while, never worrying about the road ahead,
And the sun never set, sharing the sky with the moon,
I miss the nights we had,
I miss dreaming of you the way my mind created when I was in love,
The stars no longer shine for me to see.

Another shot; I need the high to carry me away,
I can’t stand to think of you,
Not when it’s still raw,
When I still bleed over you each night the blade cuts into me a bit deeper,
Those stars that witnessed our love, our chaos and mad love,
They’re black in the sky,
And I can never look at the blue sky the way I looked into your eyes,
Because I never imagined a world without you.
And now I’m stuck drifting along the coastline,
Gazing up into a sky that will never look the same.

pieces of the shattered glass you threw,

I’m left picking up pieces of the shattered glass you threw,
Bottles that you drank from too long, too much,And the poison had been in your system,
Blocking what sobriety had to offer.

This darkness I’ve known my whole life,
Become accustom to it,
Partaking in it myself,
But my demons are my own,
And I can only blame you for your actions, not the way they affecting me.

This fear I’ve let linger in the back of my mind,
Comes to life in each sip of the glass,
And my lips savor the excuse of not dealing with it.
But you, I can never know if your reasons are like my own,
Throwing, and clinging to the bottle,
Hiding behind the affects of ignorance,
I can’t ignore the problem like you do,
And that gives me the strength to fight my demons

Yet I fear your succumb to yours already,
And there is nothing I can do to pull you from your self-made abyss
Throwing glass, I’m left to pick up the pieces,
never knowing your cry for help only echoed my own…

in tears and blood

Isn’t it funny?
How we always wish we knew how the ending played out?
Laugh and say what’s meant to be will be,
But,
Going through the story is always harder then read,
And we wish, god we wish to skip to the ending.
Where our problems had been solved,
And our hardships and broken heart were but a passing memory,

But,
The story of us is hardly over,
And I’m still suffering in medias res.

The ink stained our hands, our skin, my pages,
And I still can never know what you’ll do next,
Chapter after chapter, each giving me new details to a you I have yet to discover,
I wish I never found your book,
But we both know I’m a terrible liar,
Maybe….
Maybe I wish I just need a minute,
To go through this verse,
Read the words again and again,
So the book becomes familiar and I want for another,

Or, I crave the same story,
Told so many different ways I don’t recognize it at first,
And I become too enthralled to quit you.
Isn’t it funny how we can never go back from the first chapter,
Can never undo the words engraved into our minds.
Because I never the ending,
I knew we would end up this way,
And I still read on,
In hopes I could change an ending already written in tears and blood.

forest fire of mine

Why can’t I let it go,
Why do I try, try to write the words down,
Replace them with a, better habit, a better purpose,
But the fire still rages,
And burns everything in the forest I created.

Sometimes, I let it,
Let the flames consume everything in its path,
Building on embers of pointless sparks
Chaos intensifying and I know I should pour it out,
Put I love the way the flames feel against my skin,
How their purpose would match my anger,
And they let me burn with them.

Some days, I know to stop them before they become too powerful,
Old phantoms reminding of when I let them get to far out of my control,
And some days,
I think I have them under control,

Completely,

And then

One word, one-action sets them ablaze, new found punishes crawl along the dirt,
Like the smoke wasn’t warning enough,
And my kindle had been gone, but now endless,
Forest fires, why do you burn do bright,
Why do you let me consume all in my sight.

you…

It’s you,

You always, urges and desires,
Barking and biting, gnawing at my soul,

It’s you,
Temptation to give into something I already know it toxic,

Addition never left these veins,
And I succumb,

To you,
Always you.

Crawling its way from my soul to everything I do.
And I let you,
Giving in every time…

conversations with love, how one-sided

Fires rage and heat travels between us,
What once was so passionate and even sexy,
Has tuned into a destructive force,
We argue and yell,
Only to hear our own displeasures screamed back,
How can you be the same person I fell in love with,
How can you think romantic, Valentines day gestures can fix what is broke so especially?

I don’t tell you everything and I never have
Ask yourself, when’s the last you made me laugh
It’s either a thousand questions or a million accusations
If you’re not angry I’m convinced you can’t carry a conversation
You highlight my lack of effort instead of highlighting you
Take out the titles and tell me what exactly it is you do
“I just feel like” Aka your motto and most said line
God forbid your feelings ever come second to mine

There should be a we, an us,
But somehow it’s always a you or a me.
We’ve never been able to see eye to eye
Because we both know our perspectives are right.
She can’t do this, he doesn’t help with that.
The game is as tired as the two that play it,
And Jesus I’m so done with this
We can argue and fight, scream and rant to each other ,
But…why continue it fight over the same thing…

Sometimes I wish I could fall in love with you again
Go back to desperately wanting you to be more than a friend
I wish we weren’t so familiar with each other’s flaws
I wish monogamous relationships didn’t have so many God damn laws
I know should feel lucky, I know I should care a lot more
I know I should probably go back to who I was before
But what happens when being in love turns into just loving someone
What if I told you all this arguing is just because I don’t know if you’re the one…


This was done with Valentines Fall and we’re both really psyched how this came together, a conversation about love with two people on very different sides. 🙂