fantasy forest

Creeping up,
Scarcely running away from my reality,
I find you,

Waiting,
As though you knew I’d stumble onto you here,

Among the chaos and the noise,
Even though I swear you were shut off forever,
Kept away for my own safety,

My own sanity.

But yet,
I found you; all on my own,
I dug deeper into the dirt,
Wandered further than I ever dared,
Finding you like a light among the trees,
Filtered and faint,

But you were waiting for me,
As though you thought I wouldn’t seek you out,
Surprised but not unwilling,
Creeping up on you,
You welcome me back with tangled webs and open thorns,
And into the dark forest we fall,
Further away from my reality
A mere fantasy that the sun shines on.

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sing it with me

Lies,
Just to keep you by my side,
Keep you hanging on the threads I weave,
I can’t tell whose we started to believe more,
The world or ours,

Lies,
They keep us tangled,
Keep hurting me,
In the best way,
Because I believe your stories,
Believe in the tales you spin,
Until I drown in them,
And paint me more of those pretty pictures,
Creating the image in my head,
My throat is caught in the web,
The silk tightening until it’s all I inhale,

Lies,
Lay with me lover,
And tell me all the things that you never believed,
And I’ll weave my claws into you just a little more,
Singing the pain away one note at a time…

What is it to you?

It’s the thing that keeps you up at night,

Jolting from your bed, eyes wide is a panic, Blindly search the darkness for something to cling to.

You’re quite. The only thing you hear, feel, is the pounding of your heart, the tremors that you can’t seem to shake.

A thrill you hate, but relish in it every time.

It’s the thing that won’t let you fall back to sleep, still thinking still wondering. It’s grips your mind and you can’t stray for long.

It’s the thing that has you staring into the darkness. The same one you cling to when you’re blinded, if only for your sanity. Tearing at a piece of mind. Your peace.

It’s the thing that…the thing you can’t let go of, because you don’t want to. Well, want is a strong word. You don’t let go. Because what if you can’t get it back.

It’s the thing you don’t know what you’ll do without.

What is it to you?

where did you go

Where did you go?
I’m waiting here,
Patiently, hoping you’ll find me,
It’s been a while,
Did you forget I was here?
Am I the fool?
Where are you,
I’m starting to get worried,
Did something happen,
Did you forget to let me know our plans had changed,
Or was I suppose to figure it out on my own,
While I’m sitting here,
Waiting for you to come home,
Answering these questions,
That no one asked, and I never wanted to answer them that way,
But….
Where are you?
Are you coming home soon?
Because I need to know if something had changed…

blank

Struggling to write,
Think, talk, anything,
But…nothing,
Nothing comes to my head,
Because I keep drawing blanks,
The words on the tip of my tongue,
As soon as I try to think of them,
A cloud roams over my thoughts,
Static coursing through,
Stealing any semblance of thoughts,
Of…me.
Lights go on,
And the room stays dark,
Lost in the things I can’t find the words for,
Struggling,
What was it I need to say…?

collapse

With all the lights gone,
Only shadows remain,

Some good, others carrying the weight of the chaos and destruction with them,
Each waiting in the fallen pieces of me,

Creeping up,
Ready for me to collapse under their weight.

Doubt is a funny thing,
Lingering like the shadows,

But worse, I suppose,
Because the doubt doesn’t dissipate when I turn the lights on,

It doesn’t linger,
It stays and wallows with me,

Waiting for me to collapse under its weight.
Love is the same,

Hidden in the most unexpected places,
Never where I want it to be,

And always where it needs to be
Even when I don’t want it.

But such is life,
Never following the plan or set motion,

Letting love flow and move with the moo and her tides,
Never allowing its weight to crush you,

Holding you when you collapse from everything else.

Filtered

Filtered shadows

Carved out in the slips of light left behind by the suns rays.

It’s where I know you’ll be, waiting and ready to greet me after a horrid day, a place to rest my head when I can’t hold it high.

Waiting for me to escape, vent and cry, if only to make myself feel better. Because I know you’ll never judge, with open arms and kind eyes.

Hold me a little while longer, my solace, my sanity and my home. Forever waiting in my shadow. Filtering through the mess we call life .

Carved in between the good and bad, the safest place I’ll ever find. Thanks to you.