caving

 

I give in,
I quit, I concede, I bow before you,
I can’t keep this up any more,
Too much, too much to old, to have to hold on to,
Like catching water between y fingers,
I’m helpless as it falls, dripping and trailing down my arms,
I feel it all, everything, it’s right there, powerful and raw and terrifying,
And I can’t keep my hands around it any longer than it takes to slip through,
Mocking me, caressing me with every descent,
And helpless; I want it, crave it, can’t get enough,
A fucking mess when it comes to you,
But you never stay long enough,
Slipping through again and again,
Staying long enough to create that hope,
That high I need to keep me going,
Inhaling the addiction as fast as you’ll let me
And in the same breath your grip moves to my throat,
Reminding me how vulnerable I am to you.
Maybe if I cave, maybe if I lie down, accept my own demise willing,
You’ll stay, and give me what I need all the time, everyday,
Forever.

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8 thoughts on “caving

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